desperately trying to ferret out my lost self....

Well , today was ,what can be called a "bad hair day" for me ,both in the literal sense as well as in the idiomatic sense...
literal sense?? its kind of funny....but it has to be one of my most embarrassing moments...
One of my friends dragged me to the basketball court..to watch the ongoing match (sports tournament is in progress). While rushing my way out ,after sitting for half an hour....my unruly hair got entangled in the barb-wired fence!! I tried unsuccessfully to free myself...eventually , some guys helped me out....I was too embarrassed to even look up!
Before this incident, I was already too shattered ,after being presented with the lowest marks I have ever obtained in my life.......how can I become so slipshod with my career??...I am yet to figure out. Where am I lost? The ambitious girl I used to be in my school days....may be the sand dunes of Rajasthan(I have been staying here for the past couple of years) have engulfed me completely. Most importantly, the harsh realisation that nobody but I, myself is responsible for my plight stings my soul like anything....
Anyways the day is almost over...and midnight is here!! but no reverie here...I am bitten by reality...The indifference of someone does bother me a lot....I dont know what to say..whom to vent my feelings to...after all ,how long can I hold back the excuse that I am also just another human being...I too feel the need of my feelings being reciprocated, not being left to fend for myself, the need to be taken care of and being understood. I know people do have priorities, even I do have...but do human relationships really need be made scapegoats in this process...
I seriously do believe otherwise...why can't we be selfless once in a while and put ourselves in the other person's shoes ....And what about the good Lord up above?? Is He listening??